
At the checkout in Morrison's yesterday lunchtime, apart from thinking of torching it in the vain hope a Waitrose might rise from the ashes, I realised I was doing my unloading the trolley face.
This face doesn't quite know what to do with itself. It's self-concious about the person behind me clocking my wares while trying to be as quick as I can. I love looking in other people's trollies, so no doubt they're nosing into mine. But what's wrong with that, and why so self-concious?
It's the same as my post-bowling face. You know, the one you pull after making a strike (or not) that's kind of embarrassed nonchalance. That's what I pull. I can't punch the air, it's not in my nature. I find this part of ten pin bowling slightly excruciating.
There's also my walking past groups of threatening youths face. I often employ this round south London. It's a confident, 'I'm getting on with my business so you get on with yours and everything will be fine/I'm not scared of you so don't try anything' face. It seems to work. Then again, I've probably gone by unnoticed anyway. It's not like I'm tagging on their manor.
So many faces, so little time.