Did you see the BAFTAs? They're so unglamorous aren't they? And this year there seemed to be a distinct lack of starpower meaning the whole thing went with more of a whimper than a bang.
No George Clooney or Jeff Bridges, no Meryl Streep. In fact a lot of the nominees didn't come, which is unusual these days because in the last few years the event has been well-attended by the Hollywood glitterati. The news was saying they stayed away because they knew it was going to be 'Britain's night', but i beg to differ. I know they can be skewed towards Brits - see a nom for Andy Serkis in a little local film about Ian Dury to prove that point - but it's not always the case. If Carey Mulligan and Colin Firth win at the Oscars I'll eat a Tom Ford hat. By the way, I've barely seen any of those films, much as I'd like to. Have you?
The ceremony itself was a yawn a minute. Everyone on their best speaking voices BECAUSE IT IS THE BAFTAS AND THEREFORE TERRIBLY SERIOUS. It really made me laugh. Noel Clarke putting on his glasses and expecting a reaction. Even the most mockney of actors going all RP. Perhaps that's what prevents anyone or anything from lightening the mood. It was deathly. Jonathan Ross was bombing a mile a minute. I was shocked to see it took three scriptwriters to come up with that lame performance. Perhaps his heart just wasn't in it, but he barely raised a titter. We had to wait until Colin Firth to get anything approaching humour.
That was Ross's last BAFTA hosting job and good riddance to bad rubbish. He was up there grandstanding like they all knew and loved him but once he gathered they were not there for him but for an awards ceremony so could he cut the chat and get on with it, he seemed lost and alone, with hardly any support from the crowd. All audience shots were of the stoney-faced. Even Prince William - bizarrely the new BAFTA chairman - couldn't hide the fact that he wanted to slit his own throat with boredom.
So it was down to Vanessa Redgrave to save the day. Such grace and dignity. Bonkers, rambling speech but she had lost her daughter. I loved it that she curtsied deeply to Prince William while everyone else just kissed him on the cheek. She's so old school. There's so much to be learned from that. Jonathan Ross take note. Boorish is out.
