Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Phrases I loathe

There's nothing worse than hearing people say (or see written down) the silly phrase du decade Oh. My. God. Or OMG or omigod, especially when it's a man. It's so Heat. It really irritates me. Where did this originate - Friends? That show has got a lot to answer for.

Like: 'I am so going to do this'. Another major annoyance.

I'm not fan of 'for my sins' either. Or 'it's a dirty job but someone's got to do it'. People still laugh at this. Have they been locked in a shed for 25 years? It's madness. 'Not!'. Ugh.

I'm moving to a remote Scottish isle where I will be alone and therefore not have to hear anyone speak.

44 comments:

Helen said...

I hate 'What can I do you for?'

Gwen said...

Is is just a Scottish thing or do folks in England say "I was like" instead of "I said". I say it all the time but it is so so wrong.

As in

"Ah wis like ahm gonnae dae that but then he wis like naw ye cannae dae that, so ah wis like aw right ah'll no dae it then so ah willnae"

Valentine Suicide said...

I have no idea what Gwen just said. Sorry!

You can be sure that when someone comes up to you and says "I'm not being funny but...", you really aren't going to like what they say.

Also "I'm not being racist but..." will inevitably be followed but something so offensive the BNP could use it as propaganda. (that should get you some interesting keyword search stats FC!)

I've developed a rather annoying glib response. When someone asks me
"How are you?"
I always say
"Can't complain".
It's become a habit.
Try it as you go about your day, and then count how many responses you get of:-
"Well if you did no-one would listen" .

I sometimes wonder how much of this is scripted...

Five-Centres said...

We're all living in the Truman Show, Val.

Yes, Gwen I'm guilty of 'I was like' too, and I hear myself saying it and want to kill myself.

So Hels, what can I do you for? A-hahahahahahaha!

Clair said...

'Do you have any children?'
'Not that I can remember!'
Especially when said by a woman.

Graham Kibble-White said...

I'm getting increasingly miffed by 'whether', being used in the following kind of context: "I didn't know whether I should do it". Shouldn't that then be followed by: "Or not?". Am I wrong, or does 'whether' indicate there are two options to choose between?

Please let me know whether or not I've a right to be upset here. Or whether I'm just wrong.

A Kitten in a Brandy Glass said...

Graham, you're seeing a mistake where none exists. There's no problem at all with using "whether" alone. Perhaps a nice sit-down in a darkened room will calm your fevered mind.

Five-Centres said...

Now Kitten you must have some bugbears.

Spill.

TV Cream's Anatomy of Cinema said...

I too hate all those Valley Girl-isms, like, totally. Especially when used in print by broadsheet supplement journalists on the cusp of middle age.

The one I can't stand right now is the use of 'passionate' to mean simply 'enthusiastic'. No-one said this five years ago, now it's all over the place, from self-promoting fanboys to corporate slogans. It sounds both cloying and insincere. Stop it!

Five-Centres said...

I agree. And that goes for 'edgy' too. Anything that is set at night or in a city is 'edgy', while anything that involves cars is 'high-octane'. These things are meaningless.

Red Squirrel said...

No offence but, like, you've gotta be hating LOL, innit.

(There were six I can't bear in that one.)

A Kitten in a Brandy Glass said...

FC, I am currently annoyed by very modish net-speak phrases that you probably haven't heard of yet. These include the overuse of "win" for good things and "fail" for bad things ("for the WIN!!", "so much FAIL", "I am awarding XXX a massive FAIL"), and the pointless phrase "hating on someone", instead of just plain hating them

It's my own fault, of course, for being so cutting edge (hem hem). If or when these things ever hit mainstream conversation, I'll already be jaded with being jaded....

Five-Centres said...

'Loving your work' squirrel.

Graham Kibble-White said...

So, you're SURE 'whether' doesn't presuppose two possible outcomes? Really?

Meanwhile, following Kitten's geekish gripes, I also loathe 'the big bad' instead of 'the big villain' or such like. And 'grin' as a sentence on its own, like a fucking emoticon or something. ;)

Graham Kibble-White said...

Oh! On the 'whether' front, our chief sub at work says strictly speaking, it does mean there are two possible outcomes, but common usage means it's now also accepted in what I'd term - damn you all! - the wrong sense. So, I feel I'm a little bit right here. Hooray! And boo for common usage!

Ishouldbeworking said...

All of the above (including "all of the above"), plus "to the max", "twenty four-seven", "good" in response to the question "how are you?" (you're "good"? So you give a tenth of your salary to charities and reuse all your bathwater, do you?), rampant overuse of "literally" as with the man I heard getting out of a Central Line carriage two weeks ago declaring it was "like the Somme in there - literally", the windbags' favourite prefix "I have to say..." ( NO! You DON'T!), "at this moment in time" (what's wrong with "now" - try brevity, you'll like it), "none-more-indie/emo/rock/insert lazy music journo adjective here", "are we keeping you up?" uttered by the office wag who's been dying to catch you yawning for ten years just so he can trot that one out, and "all day", as in "it's the 24th. All day."

And I could go on. And on. And on.

Five-Centres said...

We've got a nice collection going here. I'm not up on netspeak, but can I just add:

'with respect' (they're going to be rude anyway), 'chill-out' (soooo '90s),
'yeah?' (as in 'I'll have a Guinness, yeah?'. Whatever happened to 'please'?)

Red Squirrel said...

ishouldbeworking's opened up a whole new world of suppressed irritation for me: unnecessary lazy journo words. I HATE "seminal" and "eponymous", often (far, far too often) used in music reviews – despite the fact these words are usually used correctly, 99.9% of the time they're wholly superfluous and just used in an attempt to sound clever. With respect, nobheads.

Anyway, isn't it wonderful how the English language remains so dynamic and fluid?

PS Can I get a cup of joe, FC? Or am I not actually from New York?

Five-Centres said...

I'm coming to kill you, Squirrel

Clair said...

I loathe 'for free' instead of just 'free'. Also, anyone who uses the word 'awesome' in anything other than to describe something major which inspires awe - as opposed to a hat or a computer game - will have their guts removed by me and made into a pair of braces.

TV Cream's Anatomy of Cinema said...

Man, I love me some Five-Centres linguistic vitriol.

Have we had 'as you do' yet?

Five-Centres said...

No we haven't AoC, but it's a shoo-in.

A Kitten in a Brandy Glass said...

Another peeve of mine is the overuse of the word "random". It is an inoffensive and necessary word when used to describe a specific chance quality, but it now seems to have been appropriated to mean "mad/crazy/wacky/stupid/just showing off", as in "Like, how totally random!" or "Oh ignore me, I'm just being random!".

By the way, are we approaching your Most Comments Ever for a blog post, FC?

Red Squirrel said...

Cheer up, it might never happen! lol!

Red Squirrel said...

Thanking you!

Red Squirrel said...

Oh, and anyone who quotes catchphrases from TV comedy (The Fast Show/Harry Enfield/Catherine Fucking Tate) in a vain attempt to claim the humour as their own – when it wasn't even funny in the first instance.

TV Cream's Anatomy of Cinema said...

'Different than'.

Five-Centres said...

Indeed we are Kitten. It's a new record.

See, when we're rankled, we like to share.

Like this one: Diva now applies to any female singer, even those who are the opposite of the meaning of the word.

Red Squirrel said...

While we're at it, "different to". Though that doesn't bother me that much, it's just wrong.

Graham Kibble-White said...

Another one: "Enjoy!"

Ishouldbeworking said...

Hah!! I forgot 'enjoy'. Particularly ire-provoking when followed by the word 'guys'. Waiters/waitresses, take note.

Helen said...

I hate it when people say 'me, myself, personally' and also use 'yourself' inappropriately (usually shop assistants)

Valentine Suicide said...

Have I mentioned I'm 41 'years young'

I love being referred to as someone's 'bitch' Happens almost daily.

And yes, we know 'you're a woman and can multitask'. -Twice a day at least.

FC is going for the comments record! Is the onward referral from Andrew 'The Blogfather' having an effect?

Valentine Suicide said...

I also loathe the phrase

"It's ten O' clock and [insert name of facile fame-seeking Twatbag] is in the the diary room"

At least it tells me it's time to turn off the tv though.

Rich said...

Any woman who describes themselves as 'feisty' can fuck off. I once heard that 'feisty' originally meant 'flatulent'.

Gwen said...

I'm back and heartily impressed by the number of comments here.

Here's another couple of things:-

When something awful has happened to someone, certain papers refer to the person as "tragic" as in "Tragic Anne buries love cheat hubbie". Is it not the event that is tragic, not the person who is tragic?

Also - can anyone clear up an issue with Bugbear. I thought that a bugbear was an annoyance. However the Collins Pocket English Dictionary states the meaning as "an imaginary terror" or "anything causing needless or excessive fear". Can anyone explain.

Again FC - well done on the number of comments.

Sky Clearbrook said...

Here are just some examples (out of the hundreds) which get right on my nerves...

"Ithangyou" instead of just "Thank you" or "Thanks". I know that one's probably quite old fashioned, but there's always some "whacky" buffoon somewhere who's prepared to say it at least once a day whilst they fiddle with their tie in the style of Oliver Hardy.

When newsreaders say things like , "The Prime Minister has arrived in Gleneagles ahead of tomorrow's summit..." instead of just saying something like, "...for tomorrow's summit".

When new initiatives are described as being "rolled out". Why not just "introduce" or "implement" them?

"What are your key learns?" - why not just say, "What did you learn?".

Shit... I could go on...

Sky Clearbrook said...

...and I will...

I detest people who insist on inserting the word, "basically" into every sentence.

Pah!

Five-Centres said...

Aren't we a cross lot.

Something I noticed this morning:

'At the top of the hour'. I HATE this.

I'm not keen on 'and here's the news where you are' either, but it's kind of different.

Now Gwen I thought bugbear was like a bete noire or a hobby horse.

And Val, I wasn't aware therre was any onward referal from the Blogfather... but I've just looked and there is. I'm very pleased.

I'm amazed at the amount of comments.

TV Cream's Anatomy of Cinema said...

Why stop now? Let's get enough for a book!

Oh yes, 'filling out' a form. Everyone says this now. But not me, oh no.

Graham Kibble-White said...

"34 years of age" - no, it's "34 years old".

Pam said...

'Bubbly'- for which read 'complete nutjob'

Usually applied to fifty something women with faces like the proverbial bag of plumber's implements, describing themselves in lonely hearts ads.

Valentine Suicide said...

Whilst I think about it, and you're recording them:-

Me:"How are you?"
Twatbags:"Livin' the dream.."

UGH

office pest said...

"Yay"

I hate the derivation, connotation and use of that word; it's never excusable, anytime, anywhere.

Also "hey-ho". Especially when uttered by mediocre office operators as a response to bad decisions that they don't have the moral fibre or backbone to resist.
I want to smash their smug faces in when I hear that.

Oh dear, I have anger issues...

"Bless!"

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