Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Leave me alone!

Spam. Don't you hate it? If it's not enough that I get about 1000 emails a day about Viagra, penis enlargement, erectile dysfunction or cheap watches, then I'm on all sorts of mailing lists whether I want to be or not.

Currently bombarding me is the English National Ballet School. Anything that goes on there bears no relation to my line of work. So why do they send this to me?

How does one get on these lists? I've just managed to unsubscribe myself from the Oxford Union and The University Of Canterbury, who sent constant emails and press releases about non-TV related subjects for inclusion. Have they actually read my magazines? And no, I didn't ask to be a member of MediaBox so please release me.

I've had no luck binning off the Police fan club newsletter, which I've unsubscribed from about three times, and still it comes. They were shit in concert and a real disappointment and I want nothing more to do with them. And I ordered one item from John Lewis and now I get about three emails a day.

Some of the spam subject titles are like T Rex or Julian Cope albums: Satellite Electricity Library Woman Diamond Potato Skeleton, or great lost psychedelic singles like Chandra's Grand Erectile Organ by Bobby Reyna.

At least they're vaguely interesting.


Clair said...

I am now crying with laughter at that last paragraph. Have you read that book Delete This At Your Peril, about a man's battle with spammers?

Bright Ambassador said...

I've only just started getting spam - I was feeling slightly left out before. And aren't those penis enlargements tempting? I'd love to know how they're going to make this monster any bigger.

I once signed-up a Rush-hating friend of mine for Rush newsletters as a joke. He tried unsubscribing too, it didn't work. I feel as though it's driving a wedge between us.

office pest said...

Following a living room denunciation the other day as we watched 'Celebrity', I anonomously signed Mrs OP up to the Lynne Franks website.
The ensuing language at work when she logged in and clicked on the innocuous looking link was apparently much less then serene, underlining the correctness of my reasoning in the first place; she needs to r-e-l-a-x.
I have been advised that Christmas is hanging by a fraying thread, ha ha.

Annie said...

Dear 5Centres,

Your recent blog has come to my attention. I work for the English National Ballet School and would like to get further information from you about the spam you have been recieving from us. We do not do group emails regularly and cetrainly nothing is automated. Could you please get in touch so I can investigate the problem? I would like to make sure no-one is somhow using the school's account or that others are having the same trouble.

Thank you very much

Annie Harvey

Five-Centres said...

Hi Annie
Well it was from someone called Anita at Hamilton Parker, which I'm assuming is a PR company, about your forthcoming production of The Mystery of The Dancing Princesses.

I don't think it's anything sinister, but it's not in the least bit appropriate for the magazines I work on.

I don't want to name them as I don't want to compromise my anonymity, but let's just say they do not cover ballet in any shape or form, which proper research by the company would have uncovered.

No harm done. I hope that clears it up.