Wednesday, July 16, 2008

7938 channels and nothing on

Isn't there a lot of shit TV on at the moment. Actually 'at the moment' is the wrong phrase - it's all the time.

Bonekickers is just dumb-fuck rubbish, with Julie Graham, who always turns up in crap (Strictly Confidential, William and Mary - and soon the Survivors revival, which really hurts already). It's a kiddie show, that even they mock. The acting's shocking, the dialogue is insane - just because Matthew Graham and Ashely Pharoah created Life On Mars doesn't mean they have the midas touch. The BBC forums are alive with disgruntled viewers. It makes Rogue's Rock look like Lord Of The Flies.

You won't have seen Harley Street yet, but it's another ITV drama-by-numbers disaster that wants to be Nip/Tuck meets Holby City with a cast of dull ex-soap stars hamming it up. Suranne Jones was only good as Karen McDonald in Corrie. Paul Nicholls is awful in everything. It's trash. Avoid.

Channel 4 is awash with Big Brother, which I have zero interest in, and most night I scour the schedules to see if there's anything at all worth watching on the main channels. And there isn't. Even BBC4's pickings a bit lean at the moment.

I never even look at five. I don't like Dexter.

Even Corrie's gone off.

The only things worth watching are The Wire (but the way everyone bangs on about how marvellous it is could put some people off), Casualty (you can't beat it), Celebrity Masterchef, Mary Queen Of Shops, EastEnders is okay, and I'm quite enjoying Last Choir Standing, even though we don't see much of the choirs and Sharon D Clarke is a big I Am.

Otherwise it's DVD box sets (currently Big Love series 2, Mary Tyler Moore series 4) or films.

Read a book!


A Kitten in a Brandy Glass said...

I have avoided Bonekickers thus far, but I accidentally clicked through to the Beeb's website for it yesterday and found that the title of yesterday's episode was misspelled in big letters across the front page: "WARRIERS". It must have been wrong all week, but no one's watching the show and certainly not reading the website to point this stuff out to them. (Sadly the front page has now changed to advertise next week's episode, so no more typo, boo.)

All I'm watching at the moment is Top Gear, and occasionally Mary QOS (but she's getting a bit samey now). Everything else is crap.

Benjamin said...

You are right. Bonekickers is shite and Harley Street, from the trailers I've seen, looks even worse. Agree with you, too, about Coronation Street, but I also find EastEnders unwatchable at the moment.

Thing is, from what I can tell, all these programmes are very popular (obviously don't know about Harley Street yet, but you know what I mean) and they are, as a result, the ones that seem to be given the most publicity in magazines like Radio Times etc.

I was leafing through my mum's TV Times over the weekend and they gave a big splash to Harley Street, for example. I can't imagine they'll be giving The Wire a cover when it's next on telly, will they?

Do you think there's any relation to the amount of hype a show is given beforehand and the audience figures it then gets?

Five-Centres said...

Certainly, and that's why week one figures are always significantly higher than the subsequent weeks, once everyone's discovered how rubbish a programme is. Indeed, Bonekickers has shed 1.6m viewers in its second week.

Clair said...

What IS Adrian Lester doing in Shitkickers? Earning money, and little else, that's what. I find it so depressing that, being awfully talnted and handsome, he's not the lead in something half-decent. Oh yeah, that'll be because he's black.

Since Mad Men ended, I cannot bear any kind of drama on the box. Agreed with Kitten that even my beloved Mary is getting tired. Good job I have a televisual PLOT of my own going on *muhahaha*!

Five-Centres said...

Yes, come on Clair, get those programmes on the telly and give us some light relief.

Adrian Lester is back soon - in Hustle. Oh good.

Planet Mondo said...

TV has become hopeless - there is literally nothing entertaining, engaging or interesting on. I spend more time hopping than watching, only to switch off after ten minutes.

I cancelled Sky ages ago, and can't be doing with Sky Plus, HD recorders or i Player - why bother? there's nothing worth seeing first time around anyway.

The Bonekicker trailer seemed so flat weary and dreary I've given it a swerve. Feel like I've been beaten over the head about The Wire, so am avoiding that one. But would like to have seen the Live From Abbey Road series.

It's DVD boxes, music DVDs of gigs etc.. and YouTube for me.

Ishouldbeworking said...

I tried to watch TV last night and found there wasn't a single thing I had any interest at all in watching. In the end I gathered around the Old Joanna and had a right old knees-up. I might go Pearly.

Five-Centres said...

That's the spirit ISBW.

TimT said...

Agree with the general sentiment, but I can usually find something worth watching on BBC4. Not just the music docs, either; last night’s Jon Ronson programme on Stanley Kubrick’s Boxes was fascinating.

Also, as a US sitcom and cartoon fan, I can usually find an episode of Frasier, Family Guy, My Name Is Earl, Arrested Development, South Park etc etc to watch to pass an empty half-hour.

rockmother said...

The only thing I get excited about on telly these days are re-runs of The Sweeney (despite the fact I own the entire box set and would probably win at Mastermind if it was my specialist subject) and The Professionals. And Mary Queen of Shops only because she is so rude.