Andy beat goes on

I'm assuming you saw The Apprentice last night. I enjoyed it. They're all awful, of course, wise to what's expected of them with no practical business experience, and instantly setting out the battle lines.

I've got my initial hate figures sorted: that Geordie who moaned constantly called Phil, and the project manager of the girls' team. Not keen on the hatchet-faced bitch she called into the boardroom with her either, but there's always one of those per series, so she should be good value. They're all dim bulbs, though Sirallan seems a bit nice than last time. Has the credit crunch made him lighten up? It's possible, though I'm not sure why that would be. So far so good. The right thing happened in firing that funny-looking girl, and I'll definitely be tuning in next week.

*I didn't see a single shot of the gherkin - or did I blink at the wrong time?

Anyhoo, on to today's topic, which is whatever happened to former international playboy, Prince Andrew?

He's the forgotten Royal. The black sheep of the family. Once never out of the papers in his naval uniform, grinning for Britain and now nowhere to be seen. I realise I don't know anything about his life. He's so in the background as to be practically invisible. You never see him doing any public engagements. And since he split up with Yorkie there doesn't appear to have been anyone else in his life. He's never linked with anyone, whereas pre-Yorkie he always had some exotic popsy hanging off him, and was often pictured larking about in the surf with women in orange string bikinis. But not anymore. I want to know why not.

Newspapers couldn't less about him. This is strange. I don't think I've even seen a recent picture of him. Is he dead? I've heard various scurrilous rumours about him, like him being found in bed with ________ or that he's ____, but of course I can't repeat them there.

Are you as intrigued as me or, perhaps like the rest of the world you've forgotten he actually existed.