From Beyond Five-Centres

We're going to a 50th birthday party this weekend. They're cropping up a lot at the moment. Once it was fortieths, now it seems to be fiftieths. Not my own I might add. That's quite a way off. It's fancy dress of course, 1950s. You know how I'm not keen, so I'm not doing it. Mrs F-C is going as a gin & it.

Anyhoo, I wonder if anyone can help me track down the Amicus-like film Tales That Witness Madness. It's a portmanteau number in the classic tradition of From Beyond The Grave, The House That Dripped Blood, Asylum and Tales From The Crypt. In one of the stories, Joan Collins' husband Michael Jayston turns into a tree. I'm sure I've seen years ago, but it's not on DVD. Anyone have a copy I can buy off them?

I love these films. You usually get two out of five good stories. For example in Dr Terror's House of Horrors I like the one about the plant that takes over the house, and in Vault of Horror the one where the man finds he's in a cannibal restaurant is quite good. Tales From the Crypt has the classic Planet Mondo endorsed Joan Collins terrorised by a maniac Santa on Christmas Eve just after she's bludgeoned her husband to death, in the most 1970s living room known to mankind.

These films are always choc-a-block with stars: Jack Hawkins, Roy Castle, Diana Dors, Peter Cushing, Charlotte Rampling, Kim Novak, etc., etc. Why don't they make this kind of film anymore, and why don't they show this kind of film anymore. When I was a kid, these were on about every week. I was terrified but I still love them.

So, if anyone can help me, I'd be most grateful.