Tuesday, August 25, 2009

On The Wain


Don't you find Rufus Wainwright irritating? I found him so before I'd even heard a note of his music. He's got a really slappable face. Then I heard it and found him even more so.

He's exceptionally vain and so full of himself. I read an interview with him the other day saying he was, and I quote 'an exceptionally beautiful child'. Who actually says that kind of thing with a straight face? I know he's the product of 'artist' parents, but FFS, Rufus! And now you think you're Judy Garland. The conceit of the man.

So that's him trashed, here are Five-Centres' Top Five stupid TV blokes:

1. George Lamb Does he realise what he looks like? With his coiffed greying locks swept up into some Douglas Hurd in Spitting Imagae pompadour, his outfits that comprise a suit and tie up top, rolled up jeans and espadrilles down below. It's absurd. He's like that game Misfits. I bet someone in wardrobe's having a laugh. And he's hateful on the radio.

2. Steve Jones The very definition of fancying yourself. If he's not careful he'll swallow himself whole. Poor man's Vernon Kaye.

3. Jamie Oliver I'm on him, then off him, then on him...he does some good deeds and his food is easy to cook and always delicious, but he's such a tit.

4. Gethin Jones Silly, excitable Welsh beefcake who's in some publicity arrangement with Welsh diva Katherine Jenkins. No one believes that for a moment. It's going to take more than that to break out of kid's TV.

5. The blokes of Bang Goes The Theory The one called Dallas especially. Who's called Dallas? Twats, that's who.

As you were.

3 comments:

Suzy Norman said...

George Lamb is a bizarre choice for that living autopsy show (the name escapes me). He looks like he lives the cokehead London life (although obviously I'm not saying that he definitely does, defamatory people). But strangely I quite like the show for the odd choice of presenter.

Ishouldbeworking said...

I'm with you all the way on the terribly over-rated Rufus Wainwright. A vapid fop with a Judy Garland fixation, my how interesting.

And on any other day I could work up some bile for George Lamb, too, but today I'm busy despising Gary Crowley (who, inexplicably, is standing in for Gideon Coe on BBC 6 Music). The man is a veritable gibbon.

Clair said...

Crowley still sounds like a teenager who can't believe his luck at a radio gig, and one who is crap.

I love Poses by Roofy Baby, but his arrogance is breathtaking.

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